Portal 2 (X360) [Single-Player Campaign Only]

Since a certain someone decided to be an ass and review the first Portal game, I thought I should be an even bigger ass and review the more story-driven sequel. See what you did? You turned me into an ass. You monster.

As soon as I picked up Portal 2, I fired up Microshit's latest console and got to play. I was researching and they said that this would be like six times longer...so I turned off my phone and cut myself off from all social connections. But unlike some people, I didn't beat the game in a day. I didn't wanna hear GLaDOS do karaoke that much...now the game starts off with Chell inside this shitty looking hotel room. This personality core named Wheatley comes out and guides you. Also, no homo, but that accent is fucking sexy. It sounds British and Australian at the same time...but yeah. He asks Chell to talk...he clearly doesn't know she's a "mute lunatic"...the game prompts you to press "A" (or "X" if you're a PS3 owner :P) to talk. Hilarity ensues. The story picks up some more, I find a few easter eggs along the way...then the puzzles. 

Portal 2 does the same as the first one, making you get the gun, then obtaining the respective portal colors if I remember right. Oh and by the way, SPOILER WARNING. So stop reading if you don't wanna know how Wheatley the moron and Chell reawaken GLaDOS. Oops. Did I spoil it?

But yeah, they reawaken GLaDOS, our favorite sarcastic villian. Score one for the good guys. *clap* *clap* You spend the next few chapters testing and then plot comes back in. After escaping the clutches of GLaDOS...I won't spoil anything else. Just know, Wheatley is a fucking moron. Seriously.He was programmed for it. Not even joking. And thus I found myself carrying a potato with A.I. built in and now I'm at the bottom of Aperature Science Labs...listening to a dead man bitch about lemons as the potato has an orgasm...

I got so stuck around chapter 7. So I called in a specialist. A specialist being your very own Oaxan. He guided me and we finished the game out. But the ending. Holy shit. Not too many FPS games actually emotionally move me...actually, none do. I dunno why, but the ending of this game just...makes me tear up. And I expect a Portal 3. Why? Well, why not? Portal 2 was a beautiful game. 'Nuff said. I wish I could've put out more spoilers, but I didn't feel like being that mean.

Portal 2:
Graphics: 9/10
Plot/Storyline: 10/10 (You thought bring-your-daughter-to-work day was for teh lulz? Hell no.)
Gameplay: 9/10
Overall: 9.5/10

The only issue is...no DLC. And I love how the PC version has over 80 bucks of useless DLC. xD ALSO, the official DLC releases this Summer. And it's free.